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Can You Help Me?

By, Shirley Hartnett



The other day a huge, ugly spider jumped on me (just between you, me, and God—I think it was a tarantula). I screamed. I called my exterminator. “Help me! What should I do?”

“Stay out of his way! They are harmless.” It was easy to ask for help and then listen to the answer. Another day I had a severe allergic reaction to a vaccine. Did I ask for help? No. Did I even ask for prayer from my people? No. 


I admit, if asking for help and listening to it were dependent on a grade, I would probably score an F.


According to studies, there are several reasons we don’t ask for help–even when we should:

  • We are an over-giver.

  • We don’t want to be seen as “needy.”

  • We think it’s better/safer/easier to go it alone.

  • We don’t want to bother others.

Other studies show that overcoming these obstacles and asking for help has huge benefits:

  • We experience less stress and anxiety.

  • We find solutions quicker and achieve goals faster.

  • We connect with others.

  • We grow in trust and intimacy and feel supported by others.

  • We allow others to feel valued by us.


Asking for help means we lay aside our pride and our insecurity simultaneously. Pride, because saying, “help me” means we have to drop the mask of being super-woman in all areas of life. Insecurity, because we must overcome the fear of bothering someone when we ask for help. We all need help in some area, whether it’s in our personal life, professional life, spiritual life, or relational life. But, only those of us who seek help find it.


The truth is, God wants us to ask for his help and God promises to give us His help. Nothing is too big; nothing is too small. One of the primary titles of the Holy Spirit is “the Helper.” In church I've always felt the presence of God. No matter what, I knew I could go there and I'd feel God. 


So the other day I asked for help. 


There was one place at my church where I always felt the presence of God. No matter what, I go there and I feel God’s presence. Lately, no matter how much I tried, prayed, or pleaded, I couldn’t feel God’s presence. I needed help.


There is a saying “I was this many days old when I learned this,” and I was 68 years old when Mark Haywood taught me this valuable truth. God’s presence is always with you. What you’ve always been feeling is God’s pleasure, and you won’t feel his pleasure at the place you aren’t meant for anymore.


God’s presence is always there whether I feel it or not.


I believe God made me for a purpose and it's in his purpose for my life that I will feel His pleasure.


What a mind shift!


“And this is the confidence (the assurance, the privilege of boldness) which we have in Him: [we are sure] that if we ask anything (make any request) according to His will (in agreement with His own plan), He listens to and hears us” (1 John 5:14 AMPC).


When do I have true confidence in God? I am willing to apologize when I have fallen short.

I am willing to ask for help because I realize my confidence is in God, not myself.

My confidence is in God, I don’t feel threatened, I don’t fear. I can listen.


Can you help me go from an F to an A?

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